School for Bandits Read online

  THIS IS A BORZOI BOOK PUBLISHED BY ALFRED A. KNOPF

  Copyright © 2011 by Hannah Shaw

  All rights reserved. Published in the United States by Alfred A. Knopf, an imprint of Random House Children’s Books, a division of Random House, Inc., New York. Originally published in Great Britain by Jonathan Cape, an imprint of Random House Children’s Books, a division of the Random House Group, Ltd.

  Knopf, Borzoi Books, and the colophon are registered trademarks of Random House, Inc.

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  Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

  Shaw, Hannah.

  School for bandits / by Hannah Shaw.

  p. cm.

  Summary: Ralph Raccoon is too polite, so his parents send himto Bandit School to learn to behave like a properly bad raccoon.

  eISBN: 978-0-375-98907-0

  [1. Raccoons—Fiction. 2. Etiquette—Fiction. 3. Behavior—Fiction.] I. Title.

  PZ7.S534227Sc 2011[E]—dc222010039516

  The illustrations in this book were created using a combination of pen and ink, printmaking techniques, and Photoshop.

  Random House Children’s Books supports the First Amendment and celebrates the right to read.

  v3.1

  Content

  Title Page

  Copyright

  Dedication

  First Page

  About the Author

  Mr. and Mrs. Raccoon were worried about their son, Ralph.

  He looked perfectly normal,

  BUT…

  …He didn’t act normal at all.

  He was disturbingly well behaved,

  clean and tidy,

  and he even brushed his teeth.

  Not only that, but he was shockingly polite.

  “We didn’t bring you up to be like this,” sighed his dad.

  “How will you ever become a great raccoon bandit like Grandpa Cutlass or Uncle Whiskers?”

  “It’s time you learned some bad manners.…

  We’re sending you to Bandit School.”

  When Ralph arrived at Bandit School, he saw at once that he wasn’t going to fit in.

  All the other raccoons looked bigger, bolder and really bad!

  The teacher took attendance. “I’m Mrs. Mischief,” she announced. “Your first lesson is Unpleasant Behavior … Now repeat after me:

  Ralph didn’t enjoy his first lesson; he wasn’t very good at it.

  “Pardon me,” gulped Ralph.

  Everyone laughed at him.

  He didn’t like lunchtime either,

  or the sports activities that everyone else was so enthusiastic about.

  The first week at school was one disaster after another.

  He failed the science test.

  He failed art.

  And he failed to impress Mrs. Mischief.

  “Ralph Raccoon! You MUST learn to take things that aren’t yours WITHOUT asking,” she scolded.

  At the end of the term, Mrs. Mischief gave Ralph his report card to take home.

  “Not much improvement,” she said with a frown.

  Then she gave them each a big sack.

  “Whoever fills their sack with the most loot during the vacation will win the BEST BANDIT IN SCHOOL competition. Good luck, everyone!”

  Ralph’s loot sack stayed empty throughout the school vacation.

  Meanwhile, all the other raccoons were busy trying to fill theirs.

  “Don’t you want to go and play?” asked his mum.

  Ralph shook his head: he didn’t want to cause trouble.

  On the first day of the new term, Ralph picked up his empty sack with a heavy heart and started to walk to school.

  It just didn’t seem right to try and win a competition by being really bad.

  Ralph was so deep in thought that he almost bumped into a flustered-looking poodle.

  “Excuse me, can I help you?” asked Ralph politely.

  “My HAIR!” she wailed. “It’s a disaster!”

  Ralph pointed her in the direction of the grooming parlor.

  “What a lovely young raccoon,” said the poodle, and gave him pawfuls of sticky sweets.

  He put the sweets in his sack and walked on.

  As he crossed the park, he gave a friendly wave to a family having a picnic.

  But something wasn’t right. They were jumping up and down, shouting: “Fluffy! Come down!”

  Poor Fluffy was clinging helplessly to a tree. Quickly Ralph climbed up to rescue her.

  “How kind!” said the family, and they gave Ralph lots of yummy goodies from their picnic hamper.

  Ralph put the goodies in his sack and walked on.

  As he strolled past the bandstand, Ralph noticed it was empty.

  He spotted the entire brass band standing at the edge of the duck pond.

  They weren’t playing their usual happy tunes. “What’s wrong?” asked Ralph.

  “Our music blew into the pond!” wailed the conductor.

  “Don’t worry!” said Ralph. “I’ll get it!”

  And he swam out to fetch it.

  “What a hero,” tooted the band, and they loaded Ralph with armfuls of treats.

  He gratefully added the treats to his collection and turned toward school.

  By now the sack was so heavy, Ralph could hardly lift it. With much tugging and struggling, he dragged it into the classroom.

  The other bigger, bolder, much badder raccoons stared in astonishment.

  Not one of them had done nearly as well.

  “Well done, Ralph!” said a rather surprised-looking Mrs. Mischief.

  “You’ve won the BEST BANDIT IN SCHOOL competition!”

  Ralph had his photo taken, and Mrs. Mischief told his proud parents, who couldn’t stop smiling.

  “Just like his Grandpa Cutlass,” said his dad, beaming.

  The other raccoons were puzzled and just a little bit jealous.“Tell us how you did it,” they begged.…

  Ralph grinned at his new friends.

  “Well, first you have to say

  ‘Please.…’ ”

  And that’s just what they did.

  Hannah Shaw

  graduated from Brighton University in England with a BA in illustration and now lives in a tiny Cotswold village with a blacksmith named Ben and a crazy long-legged dog named Ren. She is also the author and illustrator of Erroll and Sneaky Weasel, which received starred reviews from School Library Journal and Publishers Weekly.

  To learn more about Hannah, please visit hannahshawillustrator.co.uk.

 

 

  Hannah Shaw, School for Bandits

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